When Life Falls Apart: What the Dark Night of the Soul is Really Trying to Do

“The soul is brought first into emptiness and poverty of spirit. She is purged of every natural support, consolation and perception, from above and from below. Only then, radically empty, stripped naked of the old self, is she truly poor in spirit. Only then can she live that new and blessed life. This is the dark night. This is what yields union with God.”

St John of the Cross (1542-1591/2003, translation by Mirabai Starr, p.119-120).

St John of the Cross was a 16th century Spanish Christian mystic best known for his work “Dark Night of the Soul”, a poem and treatise which describes his journey through extreme suffering and eventual union with God. The word ‘God’ is often met with contempt in modern times by those convinced of the material nature of the world and who reject the baggage put onto the word by religion.

It is impossible to speak about St John’s work without reference to God, a work that is still of great relevance today, so for the purposes of this article insert whatever term you will- whether source, higher nature, universe, absolute, or atman.  What is most important is to understand the transformation St John is describing as coming from beyond the limited ego self- an awareness of a union with a higher order of things. St John of the Cross describes the process of spiritual purification as ‘The Dark Night’, which is considered a spiritual gift that has certain specific characteristics necessary to bring about spiritual awakening.

In this article I will first describe the process of the Dark Night as described by the mystic St John. He funnelled his experience into a poem and expanded upon its explanation through a treatise that analysed the poem for its deeper meanings. Through my own Dark Night that lasted 7 years, I used his teaching to give me hope and help me navigate the abyss towards its exit. I used music and art to integrate the inner pain and to reformulate it into something positive. Creativity was able to flourish through this process, aiding the healing of trauma to establish a more resilient and refined sense of self. This process is something I address in my Sound-Soul workshops.

Phases of the Dark Night

According to St John, the Dark night has two main phases. The night of sense is where the individual is separated from worldly pleasures and earthy distractions, feeling a profound separation from God. While the second phase, the night of spirit, is a purification of the soul, where an extreme suffering brings about a deep inner transformation leading to spiritual maturity.

‘In the first night of purification, the soul is stripped of senses and accommodated to pure spirit. In the other night, the spirit itself is purged and made naked in readiness for the souls union of love with God.

The night of sense unfolds for countless beginners. The night of spirit is very rare. It only comes to those who are deeply practiced, deeply disciplined.

To the senses, the first night is bitter and devastating. Yet this does not compare with the second night, which is horrendous and terrifying to the spirit.”

St John of the Cross (2003, p.58)

The dark night is not a depression, nor is it a run of bad luck, or a sense of meaningless or lack of purpose, as most new age teachings lead us to believe. The dark night is a purification which prepares the person for a deep and unmistakable communion with God. It is deeply spiritual and mystical by nature and lasts many years, ultimately leading  to a profound spiritual development and insight. While the dark night may have some of the symptoms of depression, it is more than that, having  many other qualities that make it unique to producing a deeper relationship with God.

Phase one: The Night of Sense

“The first night is accompanied by potent trials and sensual temptations, which last for a long time- longer for some souls that for others.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.84)

The dark night of sense comes to those who have a deep desire to know God, and who have asked for it in one way or another. It is a response to this yearning, and begins a period of purification which distinguishes between a lower and higher Self perceptible in the life of the initiate.

“Through radical humility, she has died to her old self.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.84)

According to St John of the Cross, the enemies to the unfolding of these higher qualities are the world, evil, and the instincts (animal nature), that try and impede the passage through the dark night of sense. These means a focus on external things of the world, such as pleasure and materialism; distraction by negative thinking and its resultant actions; and distraction by the lower instincts of pleasure, lust, power, pride, and self-worship that inhibit our spiritual growth and keep us focused on the outer world of things. These distractions are precisely those that are stripped and purified during the night of sense, and further annihilated during the night of spirit.

Among the impurities that are purified during this period are: pride, envy, greed, lust, anger, gluttony, and laziness. These ‘seven deadly sins’ have been portrayed in Dante’s Inferno, and in the Hollywood movie ‘Seven’, both illustrating the descent of the soul into darkness to achieve transformation. These 7 ‘sins’ are purified by the events of the dark night, which bring one onto the path of seeing ourselves from ‘above’, able to see our faults and traumas, and slowly let go of the negative qualities that hinder our spiritual development. In Dante’s ‘Inferno’, this is portrayed by his descent into hell aided by the guide Virgil, who helps him grow in maturity by witnessing firsthand the qualities that lead one to live a tortured existence. Similarly, in the movie ‘Seven’, the naïve detective Mills (Brad Pitt) is unwillingly led into a hell world, guided by his wise partner Somerset (Morgan Freeman) and the serial killer (Kevin Spacey), who brings him face to face with his own pain, suffering, and immorality. The dark night entails extreme pain and suffering as the soul is stripped of worldly pleasures and focused on the development of higher spiritual qualities, which occurs through purification of ones lower nature.

“God places them in this night just to temper them, to humble them, to cleanse their appetites and curb their cravings for spiritual sweetness.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.66)

Phase Two: The Dark Night of Spirit

“Only a few souls ever pass beyond the night of sensory purification and into the more formidable night of spirit where divine union unfolds.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.84)

“The stains of the old being remain in the spirit, though they may not be visible. If they are not wiped clean by the soap and strong lyre of this second night of purgation, the spirit cannot come into the purity of divine love.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.92)

According to St John of the Cross, it is the higher spirit that instigates the dark night to purge the soul. Due to the breath and luminosity of this higher spirit, and the lack of purification of the lower soul at this stage, the soul will undergo extreme pain and suffering as the light of spirit confronts it. Rudolf Otto (1958) calls this confrontation with sublimity and awe- the Mysterium Tremendom, a terror resulting from the confrontation with something beyond the ego and beyond comprehension.

The following is a summary of the experiences which confront one undergoing the dark night of spirit:

1.Extreme Purification of senses

“The mind is profoundly emersed in the knowledge and feeling of its limitations and miseries.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.101)

All fears, beliefs, conditioning, faults, fears, and transgressions are made visible. During this phase, we are overwhelmed by the number of negative qualities that rise into consciousness.  It is through becoming aware of the beliefs, judgements, and traumas that lie within consciousness that one can gradually move through them and be liberated from them.

2. Extreme pain, suffering, and terror.

“The joining of two extremes- divine and human- is excruciating.”

St John of the Cross 2002 p.103

The result of an inundation of negative qualities into consciousness creates extreme pain and suffering, but also terror as one is gripped by an overwhelming experience that is often attributed to being dammed, of losing one’s mind, or of being assailed by an external deity.  The pain and suffering at this time can last for years, with brief respites eventually giving way to new experiences of dread, suffering, and delusion, as reality is shifting and all fears are brought to the surface. This makes it difficult to live in the world, or conduct relationships, as trauma fills the world of everyday tasks. There is no other option but to persist through the pain, because it comes with an intuitive feeling that this is a spiritual quest.

2. Greater yearning for God.

The spiritual quality of the dark night distinguishes it from depression. We have an intuitive sense that it is a spiritual journey and often being to explore spiritual practices, seek out spiritual guidance, or immerse oneself in reading spiritual literature. There is an innate feeling that something is occurring in the soul which has greater meaning. This knowing provides brief states of solace and aids resilience.

3. Separation form the world

Those experiencing the Dark Night are isolated from family and friends, often physically, but definitely through feeling that no-one understands what they are enduring. This includes their spiritual teachers or close relatives, who can’t understand due to the rarity of this event. Furthermore, the negativity that rises into consciousness during this time makes maintenance of relationships difficult, as reality becomes tainted by the intrusion of thoughts, images, and feelings. This separates the individual from friends and family, and forces them to experience the event in isolation, with barely anyone able to comprehend their suffering. 

4. Purification of memory

“Besides the natural and spiritual poverty, she is likely to suffer interior torment from the radical undoing of all the remaining imperfections rooted firmly in the substance of the soul”

 St John of the Cross (2003 p.105)

The person is moved into the present moment and the past becomes irrelevant. The intrusion of trauma and negativity humbles the person and provides self-knowledge, which includes the wisdom to separate thought from reality. Memories, that once captivated and entranced the person are vividly seen as ghosts, visions in the mind, and in order to gain some liberation from them, attention must be focused on the reality of the present moment. All sense of past is evaporated in the knowledge of memory as past thought and illusion.

5. Infused wisdom

“Divine wisdom  is not only night and darkness to the soul but also terror and suffering. Its height transcends the natural reach of the soul and so it looks like darkness to her.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.99)

The experience provides a deep self-knowledge that pervades intellectual understanding. The harrowing pain and terror provides the experience of the darkest parts of the self, which results in wisdom of the nature of the self and compassion for other beings and their pain. From suffering emerges deep knowledge that transforms the individual.

6. Feeling of crossing a threshold that is permanent

“The soul has an awareness now that her greater spiritual being in somehow detached from her smaller sensual being but she doesn’t know how this happened. The two detached aspects of the self feel to her to be so distinct that the soul cannot believe they have anything at all to do with each other. “

St john of the Cross (2003, p.179)

Despite the life lived with a previous personality, the dark night of spirit makes one feel they have crossed a threshold and cannot return to their previous state. The permanence of this experience forms part of the terror, for it is innately understood that something has changed and there is no going back. The subject is forever transformed, and this is agonising. It can only be appreciated afterwards, when the rewards of the dark night are experienced.

7. Surender

“God suddenly darkens all that light. He slams the door shut….So he leaves them in such darkness they do not know which way to turn inside their imaginations.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.59)

The dark night of spirit provides the feeling there is no way out and that the only choice is to endure and persist, typically over many years. Led by the intuitive feeling of a spiritual quest, and in the knowledge that there is no going back, the person builds resilience to continue through the suffering and uncertainty.

8. Inability to pray, meditate, or focus on God.

“What the sorrowing soul feels most acutely is her conviction that God has rejected her and, in abhorance, tossed her away into the darkness.

St John of the Cross (2003 p.104)

This seems contradictory, but the soul has little energy and is consumed with fear that disables the ability to pray, meditate, or focus on God. Instead, the person believes they are very far away from being holy, abandoned by God, assailed by evil forces, and are often consumed by feelings that life will only get worse. This separation from spirituality seems counter intuitive, but is one of the reasons why a deep yearning appears in the heart of the person. Feeling abandoned by God, the person seeks spiritual solace and often starts to study or yearn for a reunion with God.

9. Spiritual connection and deep peace

“Her disposition is purified and simplified. Her palate is purged and healed so that it can taste the sublime and wonderous textures of divine love. All obstacles are driven out. The soul is transformed.”

St John of the Cross (2003 p.119)

Despite the hardships, there are brief periods of relief with moments of joy and peace. Eventually, the suffering will make way for a new sense of well-being, deep peace, and a loving relationship with God. To those with a religious background this may be a return to a religion, or for others it brings a deep communion with our spiritual nature and the synchronicity of life. No longer is life seen as a series of random events, but a sense of belonging emerges, synchronicities start to be visible, and life takes on a magical and mystical quality with a sense of reverence.  Awakening ensures. This aspect is important from distinguishing a dark night from depression or nihilism as it brings one into deep connection with a higher source of wisdom. It produces a profound spiritual transformation where the person is permanently changed from his or her previous version of themselves.

10. A sense of the divine

“With the faculties, passions, and desires of my soul stilled and annihilated, I moved from my own human dealings and activities into the dealings and activities of God. My understanding departed from itself. It changed from natural to divine. “

St John of the Cross (2003 p.98)

This transformation results in the person coming to think of themselves in relation to the cosmos and its creator. Life becomes a magical play as they develop a deep union with a higher source. This sense of the divine makes them feel alien to lower human ways, and they are amazed and wondered by the higher things they feel and experience. They are now informed, not by the ordinary things of human beings, but by the divine. 

This article describes the night of sense and stages of the night of sprit. It offers a guide that brings hope to those undergoing their own transformations. From a psychological perspective, it outlines the archetypal model for transformation appearing in countless myths and religions, as well as the modern stories we hold dear. Most important, it describes the way humans transform from ego to whole Selves, personalities more aligned with life and guided by a higher purpose. If you would like to know more about working with these mythological structures through music and art, as is outlined in the Sound-Soul system, please get in touch.

References

John of the Cross (2003) Dark Night of the Soul. Trans. Mirabai Starr. Riverhead Books. 1542-1591

Otto, R. (1958) The Idea of The Holy, Oxford University Press.